Things I learned in pilates

Awhile ago I got talked into buying a coupon for 5 pilates classes at a studio owned by a friend of a friend. Last week I finally went to my first class and today went to my second. Here are a few things that I have learned:
1. Barre classes are really hard. Contrary to what people might think, you won't look like a picture perfect ballerina in this class. You will sweat and be gross and work muscles you didn't know you had. Also, there aren't any free drinks or cocktail tastings.
2. Mat classes are also hard. The mats are soft and cushy but you aren't allowed to just take a nap. You will sweat and be gross and work muscles you didn't know you had.
3. Pilates instructors may look really sweet and pretty and nice but they are secretly out to get you. After you almost die doing one exercise, they'll tell you to do it again and the second time they will count slower.
4. After a pilates class, everything you pick up will be heavier. I don't know how the universe coordinates this, but it's true.
5. My abs don't like working. They prefer to stay hidden away under their protective layer of cushioning.
6. After my first barre class, my legs turned into jell-o. They stayed this way for 3 days.

I have 3 more classes to go. Wish me luck.