Starting Over?

The last couple of weeks have been a bit of an emotional roller coaster for me (including a very uncharacteristic complete meltdown last weekend). I think that this ride has been caused by two larger issues.

1. I feel a little like I am starting over a little bit in life. However, I'm not starting over completely by my own choice. I've had a large number of friends move away in the past year. These friends are the ones that lived across the street, one block over, or a couple of streets away. They are the people that I would run into on my way to the store. The people that I would hang out with on the weekends or for just an hour on a week night because we could. They were the neighbors that I could go borrow a cup of sugar from. While I am happy for all of them because of the opportunities that have taken them away, it has made me sad and forced me to start over some finding friends. Don't get me wrong, I still have plenty of friends in the city. But, the friends that moved away are the ones who not only lived close, but were also in the same life stage as me. They didn't have to check in with a significant other (at least not most of them) before hanging out. They didn't have to find a babysitter if we wanted to grab a drink on a Tuesday night. So, I'm redefining my circle of local friends.
I'm also starting over with work some. I'm starting the process of looking for my next career move (I'm ok saying this because my boss knows about this). I don't totally know what I'm looking for, but it's time to make a move and find a new challenge. At the same time, my current work situation is about to change dramatically with one of my co-workers leaving soon for his own new adventure. He will be greatly missed and not just because it will mean more work for everyone until we fill the position. He is a great co-worker, someone that I learn from almost daily, and a great friend. (At least I still get to be his friend after he leaves).

2. Starting over exaggerates the other issue that I'm dealing with. I'm sick and tired of being single and I don't really want to have to go through all of this by myself again. I'm at a point in my life where I am confident in who I am (both inside and out) but I start to question what might be wrong with me that a guy isn't interested (never really has been). I know that's the wrong thing to think because there's nothing wrong with me. But, that's the stupid thought that goes through my head. This second issue is what I had a complete breakdown about last weekend.

Regardless of these issues, I know that I am taken care of. I have friends who will come over late at night and bring me cupcakes and let me have a crazy girl moment. I have friends who let me borrow their husbands when I have a 'boy job' that needs to be done. I have a church family that I enjoy very much. I am blessed (I just have to remind myself of that fact a lot lately).